Five Questions I Ask Before Joining a Debate

I used to jump into every debate with a ready answer. These days I pause first and ask myself five things.

1. What is the question really asking? Half of all arguments are about different questions.
2. What would change my mind? If nothing could, I am not debating, I am announcing.
3. What is the strongest reason on the other side? I try to write it down in my own words.
4. Do I know enough? If not, I read first and post second.
5. Can I say it kindly? The same point lands very differently with a calm tone.

It takes a couple of minutes, and my replies have got shorter, clearer and much less angry.